After hearing for what felt like the thousandth time that one of my friends had been so “busy” making it next to impossible to get together, I looked up the word in the dictionary.
having a great deal to do.“he had been too busy to enjoy himself”
synonyms: occupied, engaged, involved, employed, working, hard at workverb
keep occupied.“she busied herself with her new home”
synonyms: occupy, involve, engage, concern, absorb, engross, immerse, preoccupy
I get it. We are busy. Busy little bees. Work, school, church, kids, pets, grocery shopping, cooking, meal planning, working out, an occasional date night or wedding to attend, a family day trip or vacation. Someone gets pregnant, someone gets sick, someone passes away, someone needs help with their dog or kids. There’s Facebook, Instagram, SnapChat and all sorts of other ways to stay “social”, but for how “busy” everyone is I’m surprised how any of these channels gets any traffic.
Are we really “that” busy?
So occupied with daily obligations and routines that we put our friends and loved ones on the back burner? Are we taking any time out for ourselves to live our best life? Are we scrolling through feeds mindlessly wasting precious minutes of our day when they could be used for something else?
I read something not long ago that has imprinted itself onto my mind. And forgive me, I didn’t take note of the author. It was “Instead of saying ‘I’m so busy’, say that you are taking time for what is important to you.” And isn’t that the truth?
I will make time for what is important to me.
Whether that be a phone call to my Nana to check on her, sending a text message to my girlfriend about to have her second baby, inviting my husband out for a date night (or night in), scheduling a teeth cleaning, or leaving the kids downstairs for thirty minutes with their dad so I can paint my fingernails.
I know most moms are all about their kids. It’s work and kids and that’s it. There’s no “me” time; there’s rarely an “us” time for them and their partner. There’s just all this “busy” being a mom. If I was so busy JUST being a mom then what is that teaching my daughter? What about all the other things that make up LIFE besides – GASP – parenting? I’m not saying to neglect being a parent. My kids are everything, too. While I write this, my two-year old has interrupted me eight times to walk me by the hand to his play room to show me his cars. I took the time to “Oooohh! Ahhhh!” and then returned to this blog post because it’s important to me.
My husband is important to me. My children are important to me. My friends are important to me. My clients are important to me. My business is important to me. My mental and physical well-being is important to me. These are all things that I need to make time for in a crazy, busy life.
So the next time someone asks you how you are, I beg you to stop and think of how you really are. Don’t just rush into how “busy” you are and how “crazy” life is. We get it. You’re busy. I’m busy. We’re all BUSY. But how are you? Happy? Content? Hungry? Needing a hair cut? Dreaming about your next vacation? Excited about an upcoming work event or project? There a million other words to describe how you are. What if you are hanging on by a thread? THEN SAY IT! Someone who cares enough to ask you how you are or how life is wants to know if you are barely hanging on. Maybe they are too and you both can honestly commiserate with each other over a pitcher of margaritas (or a cup of coffee).
My hope for society is that we become less “busy” and more intentional with our short period of time here on this earth. Make time for what is important and start busying ourselves with that.