You’ve been warned. This is personal. I am terrified to actually press PUBLISH on this post, but I’m even more terrified to not share our story of this challenge.
What’s the challenge, you may ask?
If you are just joining me, the challenge is that my husband and I will have sex every day for the entire month of September. Hence- SEXtember. Read all about the reason we embarked on this journey here!
This is the second week of Sextember and if you can recall from Week 1 I was pretty sure that it would present some challenges. The first week was a bit too “easy”. Isn’t that the way it goes with most things you start? The first few days are usually somewhat filled with excitement for a new challenge and you are confident in the newness of it all.
Well, for starters an obstacle that I couldn’t control – my period. Yep….I’m a girl and I have a period every month. And it sucks. As I get older my cycle has changed – it only lasts about 3-4 days which is great, but it results in me feeling severe exhaustion. As in I can barely make it to 9:00 PM before having to go to sleep. Also – I’ve never been a “sex on the period” kind of girl. (Shield your eyes, mom!) …. I know my husband has witnessed me literally pushing out both our kids and on the opposite side of the spectrum he’s seen me at my absolute worst during a terrible flu virus we all endured a few years ago – but for some reason this completely grosses me out. We’ve talked about it before and I’m more phobed out than he is by it, but I can’t help it. I didn’t know what we were going to do.
Another obstacle – our children didn’t sleep through the night for four out of the seven nights of the week. They were both up alternatively – for various reasons, but my husband who gets up every day at 5:30 AM to leave for work by 6:15 AM is usually the one who gets up with the kids. I would, but the reason I don’t is simply because the kids don’t go back to sleep once they see me. Plus, his week was filled with stress during work hours because he works for a nuclear power plant and our state (South Carolina) was directly in the path of a major Hurricane.
Oh yeah – THAT. Ironic that the storm was called Florence – or Flo. Hahaha….let that one sink in a bit. The schools in our city closed on Tuesday for the entire week to make room for evacuees that came from the coast which meant our schedule was off for the week. Mad dashes to the store happened for supplies which is always an event in itself with both kids and life doesn’t stop just because you are preparing for a major storm. Laundry, house work, blog posts, photo shoots, emails….all the things.
ALL that to say – we made it work! We had to be a bit creative, but we stepped outside our comfort zones and put each other first – even when I think we both could’ve used the extra sleep.
For those of you who want to know HOW we got creative – just use your imagination. We experimented with a few EXTRA accompaniments this week. Wink, wink. Most were an utter fail, but we can say we tried. On Thursday night we looked at each other and it was 10:30 PM. Neither one of us was super excited about having to make the effort. We were exhausted. But, having this challenge forced us to snuggle up and remember why we are in bed together to begin with.
This is truly the reason I’m sharing our story. Bryan and I are your average 30-somethings with everyday obstacles and challenges. We have probably been together a less amount of time than most of you who are reading this have. We don’t pretend to know how to live life any better than you or the couple down the street. What we do know is that any commitment that is worth anything takes determination and effort. Whether that commitment is to your spouse, running a marathon, fulfilling your everyday secular career, having children, or anything else that requires dedication, loyalty and time. There was a time not long ago that we almost lost sight of what brought us together. Yes, we are parents together and we are married, but that wasn’t what drew us to one another.
When we first started dating, I was fascinated just listening to Bryan talk. His southern accent literally made me weak in the knees. I remember telling my best friend that I loved just hearing his voice on the other end of the phone. Last weekend, we were having a conversation in the kitchen about his work and I was nodding and following along when I realized that I still loved listening to his voice. I went over and kissed him because how often do I take the opportunity to show him how crazy I am about him – and his sexy accent? Honestly, not enough.
As for him – I can tell that he’s enjoying Sextember very much. I came downstairs this morning to a spotless kitchen (which last night we had dishes stacked up in the sink). It made my heart soar. He knows I’m an “acts of service” person so he did it before he went to work to make my morning easier.
The point I took to heart this week is that there are always going to be challenges and LIFE. But it’s so important to remember why we fell in love with the person we are spending our life with. It is that reason that will get us through those challenging times.
Onwards to week 3….and why, it’s gonna be a good one….I can tell.